Thursday, July 26, 2012

George Theodore Smith


The sun was shining after several weeks of abnormally wet winter weather for Brisbane, so we decided to go for a walk around St Lucia. Nicole was still excited that I had more time to spend with her after several months of thesis writing. We followed the river then cut through UQ campus, stopping here and there to take pictures of the original architecture and landscaping. We even explored the UQ art gallery, which had a super realistic sculpture of a newborn baby lying in fetal position next to 3 tree frogs. Nicole was tired from bearing that massive load all afternoon so we took in the low-lying afternoon sun on a campus bench.


Back at home, Nicole and bub were starving so I cooked some turkey meat loaf, apparently my best ever. Nicole was feeling unsettled, which soon developed into "period-like pains" around 7 pm. We continued watching an episode of The X-Files before Nicole and I realised that we were probably dealing with Braxton-Hicks. I thought this would be a great chance to test one of the contraction calculator pregnancy apps I downloaded on my Galaxy Nexus. We started to realize this might be it when contractions were averaging 1m15s every 10 minutes around 9:30 (right around when I was supposed to play hockey). Around this time, Nicole also noticed some unexpected liquid at the loo, which we suspect was some amniotic fluid. You get used to various mucous discharges in pregnancy...  Thank goodness Nicole squeezed in that meal before the contractions got harder.

We had leased a TENS machine to help Nicole deal with the contractions. We heard mixed reviews, but Nicole wouldn't have a contraction without it. We were getting really excited around midnight, and decided to get some sleep as this might well be the beginning of a very long labour. No can do! Nicole realized sleep wasn't an option after 3 contractions and the TENS unplugging itself in bed, to my dismay. At midnight Sunday night, contractions were occurring every 8 minutes and increased frequency rather quickly to about 3.5 minutes around 1:15. We called the midwifery centre, where they kindly told us to try to stay at home as long as possible. At this stage, Nicole had cranked up the amperage to something around 200 mA. At this stage, Nicole was vomiting after contractions and the pain was becoming too much to bear. "I don't think I can deal with this pain much longer" she ironically stated.

Around 4 am, we made our way to the hospital. I though that this would be an appropriate time to pack my hospital bag :-) Our midwife had just delivered a baby at 5am on Sunday, so it was to be expected she would not be around. We checked into the impressively large and well-equipped birthing suite (for a public hospital) after an initial examination: Nicole's cervix was already 4 cm dilated. I went to park the car, and when I returned, Nicole was naked in the shower, moaning every few minutes. So much for concern about exposing herself to strangers! She really enjoyed the hot water (2 shower heads), to the point where she ripped the TENS machine off. The moans gradually developed into full on gory screams as she hit the shower walls with her palms repeatedly. At this point, my only assistance was an occasional back rub or topping up what little water she could drink. Not even music would help.

Nicole wanted to give birth naturally, but now she turns to me every 5-10 minutes saying: "DRUGS... I want drugs". The attending midwife had another patient at the time, so Nicole had to deal with the maternity nurse much to her discontent. An epidural was next in our birth plan, as the nitrous gas made Nicole uncomfortable. The anesthesiologist was in surgery at the time, so she would have to wait. I felt so sorry and helpless at this stage.

Our lovely midwife Maria finally arrived around 7 am. This greatly relieved Nicole, although her hope for an epidural was still just that, hope. In what was possibly the longest 2 hours of her life, she alternated between standing and sitting in the hot shower (I spent 4 hours in there with her), occasionally rolling her head right to left a la Stevie Wonder. Maria examined Nicole's cervix, which was now 9 cm dilated. This relieved us greatly! This is also when Maria told me that we could proceed with the epidural, although she thought Nicole was doing great and could give birth quicker without. Nicole reluctantly acknowledged. I tried to remember to update my Facebook feed at this point.

Just before 9 o'clock, we started stage 2 labour. This is when to start pushing. It is a grueling, terrifying process where my sweet Nicole transformed into something between a rabid wolverine, Golumn, and the incredible hulk. We stood on either side of the bed holding hands as Nicole pushed and pushed in front of the midwife and her aid. It was intense to say the least. I had teary eyes from looking at Nicole scream and gaze at me out of focus while we listened through Pink Floyd's dark side of the moon and the Rolling Stones.

We could see the head during big pushes, but Nicole was starting to be exhausted. The obstetrician got called in at this stage to step things up. We got Nicole to sit up in the bed and pull her legs up during pushes, while repeatedly telling her to put her chin down and to hold in her screams to focus her energy into each push. Bob Dylan was barely perceptible in the background before the doctor turned the volume down (not a fan apparently). The next half hour was a stressful blur. I remember repeating instructions to Nicole as she was out of it. The baby's head was in the wrong position and couldn't straighten out, so another obstetrician was called in. Some other chick was in the room also, we were at least 7.

From what I can remember, Maria warned Nicole that they might need to perform an episiotomy given that the baby and the mum were both exhausted. The baby was also covered in myconium, which means it was stressed out and fed up. The doctors decided to perform an assisted delivery with a vacuum pump before resorting to forceps Ior a cesarean section. This is when I was most stressed and freaked out. Nicole was dealing well with labour now, especially considering she had absolutely no pain relief. As they squeezed the suction cup in her birth canal, I overheard Maria tell Nicole something like "Just to warn you that the baby has to go to the doctors first". I thought to myself, oh my god... it has some anomaly or is a mutant. Oh well, I will still love it.

A syringe filled with about 10 cc of anaesthetic was brought out and jabbed into to Nicole's vagina and perineum. I stopped looking at this stage. After some pushing instructions that no labouring mum to be could comprehend at this stage, they gave a good strong pull on the baby's head. It came down an inch or two then POP... my heart skipped a beat as I imagined the doctor ripping the baby's massive head off. It was just the suction pad. This is when I got a first look at the head, it was just small circle about the diameter of the suction pad that stuck out of the vagina, with reddish hair off the top of the while scalp. I was convinced it was a freak of nature. I saw some scissors go down below the head, which I knew Nicole would not appreciate the next day.

They repositioned the suction cup and before you can say contraction they pulled the little bugger out in 2 swift pulls. It's head was massive and very oblong, not too dissimilar to the alien movies or the Nazca skulls. All white and slimy. I accepted the deformed baby and looked at Nicole with a teary smile. The doctors then said "here is your baby!" and asked me to look at it... I was beside myself. "It's a boy!" I pleasantly told Nicole. She said "dam it! Oh well" as the midwives chuckled. I then proceeded to cut the umbilical cord, somehow managing to soil the obstetricians fancy shirt collar with a gush of arterial cord blood. It took me 3 snips; umbilical cords are tough!


I looked back at Nicole and consoled her although she had the biggest look of relief on her face. She looked as though she was really stoned. My brain kicked in and I rushed to get my camera. I waited for the midwife to rub some of the gooey vermix off the baby and then filmed him as they took him to mum. No words can describe this sight and feeling. I promptly played Born to be Wild by Steppenwolf to give him his first dose of badass.



After 10 minutes or so, Nicole had to be rushed off to surgery as she had a level 3 tear/episiotomy. That's when the tissue is cut all the way down into the anal sphincter muscle. Lots of blood. The birthing bed had somehow managed to break or become dissembled shortly after the birth, so there was a pile of afterbirth on the ground. They gave Nicole a shot of hormones to dislodge the placenta before she left, which we kept for some strange reason (its in the freezer if you're hungry). As Nicole was escorted to theatre, I had the chance to get some one on one, skin to skin with the wee man. As I held him in my arms, we gazed at each other for half an hour. I smiled like never before as my heart doubled in size while my new best buddy starred me down with his inquisitive blue eyes.


Best day of my life.


2 comments:

Char Clark said...

Some light reading for me at 3am while I feed Elliott. I suspect you and Nicole are up the street feeding your wee man at some time while I read this too. What a wonderful account of what really is a miracle. I laughed out loud when the baby's head ripped off! Thanks for sharing, I wrote a similar account of my birth experience but didn't publish it online. I'll email it to you if you promise not to webcast it!

Unknown said...

Wow! Terrifically written Mart-dog... truly honest words that capture just how incredible and awesome and scary and proud it must have been for both of you. Tears and giggles all the way through. She really has found an incredible human being to share such an amazing journey with, it's fantastic to see how much involvement you had in the birth and it really felt like you were right there every step of the way. So so happy for you both! Can't wait to see you guys and meet the little man himself! Amazing! Love Aunty Courts xx